Schlagwort: tolkien

icescrabblerjerky:

feynites:

ainurs:

penny-anna:

animate-mush:

penny-anna:

hobbit-hole:

penny-anna:

hobbit-hole:

hobbit-hole:

if i had to get in a fistfight with any member of the fellowship it would be Frodo because i would easily win

all i am saying is that he would ostensibly be the easiest one to take on in a fight given that he’s like three feet tall and has led a life of (physical) leisure compared to all of the others due to his standing as a gentlehobbit

legolas, aragorn, and gimli are all used to combat, sam works as a gardener, merry and pippin often gallivant off and get into mischief so they have the advantage of experience in whatever it is they’ve gotten up to/would possibly fight dirty, gandalf is gandalf so while weapons are out of the question i suppose that depends on if magic is involved. i don’t think i could take him without magic even if he IS old because he’s a very large guy, but maybe

it would be my knuckles against Frodo’s baby soft poet hands, plus i’ve got the additional height and fighting experience. i just think that he would be the easiest to win against in hand-to-hand combat out of the rest of them. also he isn’t real so he can’t offer a rebuttal to my claim

you’re absolutely correct BUT wanting to fight Frodo makes you a monster D:

this has nothing to do with WANTING to fight Frodo, i just think he would be easiest for me to beat in a fight with no weapons. unless he utilized his very large feet, but i think he’s too polite to do that because it’s a fist fight and that would be considered playing dirty

for someone who doesn’t want to fight Frodo you sure have put a lot of thought into fighting Frodo……….

OP is wrong though: you fight Pippin.

First off, Pippin has it coming, so you won’t be fighting your conscience at the same time.

Secondly, Pippin is a spoiled rich kid. He’s no less gentry than Frodo is, but Frodo works out and is shown to have better stamina, at least at the outset. Pippin is also both the stupidest and the slowest of the hobbits. They both nearly beat one (1) troll, so that’s comparable, but Pippin appears not to have got a single hit in against the orcs that captured them while Merry was cutting off hands like a boss. Pippin also straight-up tell Bergil that he’s not a fighter.

Also there’s a nonzero chance that Frodo will just straight up curse you (if the guilt of fighting Frodo isn’t enough if a curse by itself).

And, of course, if you try to fight Frodo, you will 100% end up fighting Sam, and he will wreck you (and you’ll deserve it, you monster)

Also: if you fight Frodo you’ll have a very angry Sam & possibly also the entire Fellowship to deal with BUT if you fight Pippin they will probably cheer you on.

Bold of you to assume one could attempt to fight Pippin and NOT instantly be killed by Boromir.

So here’s the thing – you absolutely DO NOT want to try and fight Frodo or Pippin because they are going to be protected by the rest of the Fellowship, which basically exists to stop asshole Big People from picking on the hobbits. Folk might talk a big game but when the chips are down, you are not going to lay a single hand on any of the hobbits. Either you’ll find yourself immediately fighting all four of them or else you’ll move to land your first hit and suddenly Aragorn will side-tackle you into the trees. And he probably hits like a freight train tbh.

So here’s what you do:

You fight Legolas.

The thing about fist-fighting Legolas of course is that you will lose. This is not a fight you’re gonna win no matter what. But Legolas has his standing competition with Gimli, so once the challenge is issued, he’s not gonna let anyone else step in and fight you either. No one is liable to volunteer on his behalf, either, so you will only end up fighting the one member of the fellowship. If you are lucky he might also take his shirt off. Bonus!

Anyway.

Legolas will mop the floor with you, but he’s also already convinced you’re weaker than him anyway because you’re not an elf, so he’s gonna go kind of easy on you. And when you lose he will be all snide and superior about it, which means everyone in the fellowship is gonna sympathize with you, and Gimli will probably challenge him on your behalf afterwards, but here’s the key thing:

You will have lost a fist-fight to an immortal warrior prince.

That’s a way better loss to cop to than that time you tried to fistfight a pudgy gentlehobbit and got beaten to the point of unconsciousness by his gardener, yeah?

okay so tolkien tumblr is fast becoming my fave tumblr community thank you thank you all you are the true fellowship here.

undercat-overdog:

So here’s something
weird: why did Míriel and Pharazôn marry so late? They were 138 and
137 (respectively) at their marriage, however Palantír was 82 when
Míriel was born and Gimilkhâd 74 when Pharazôn was born, which
meant they would have been married when they were no later than 81 or
73 (again respectively).

Looking at
the line of kings from when they changed to having names in Adûnaic,
none of those kings’ first children were born to a king over 100:
Adûnakhôr was 89 when his eldest son was born, Zimrathôn 78,
Sakalthôr 84, and Gimilzôr 75. They all certainly would have been
married by then, so their age at marriage would probably be in their
late 60s to late 70s.

And yet both Míriel
and Pharazôn went unmarried for twice as long. This is particularly
strange considering their expected lifespan: Sakalthôr, Gimilzôr,
and Palantír all died in their early 200s, and Gimilkhâd was 199 at
his death, so Míriel and Pharazôn probably only had another 80
years of life at most when they finally married/were forced to marry.

Míriel’s case in
particular is strange. You could posit that Pharazôn wanted to
postpone his marriage because he planned to marry Míriel and take
over the kingship, as did happen (though it would probably would have
been Gimilkhâd’s idea originally). But Míriel should have married
earlier, for both political and dynastic reasons. Even if she and
Palantír (and Inzilbêth) were worried about a Vanimelde
situation, it’s hard to believe that particular risk would outweigh the benefits. It’s possible that Palantír’s father Gimilzôr
forbade Míriel’s marriage to a suitable candidate during his lifetime, but that shouldn’t
have affected what Míriel did once her father took the throne. And
frankly, Pharazôn not marrying made Míriel’s political future even
more at risk. Perhaps Míriel had a childless first marriage and
was a widow when Pharazôn forced her to marry, but I rather think
that would be mentioned?

Anyways, there was
probably some really interesting politicking going on in Gimilzôr
and Palantír’s courts, and that’s the only conclusion I feel able to draw from this.

alikuu:

tyelp-with-a-spear:

How Gimli got to stay in Valinor

Manwë: Dwarves do not belong in Valinor. We need to get him back to Middle Earth.

Aulë: *wraps arms around Gimli protectively* Oh yeah? Good luck finishing the street lights for Valmar by yourself. Also, I hope you know how to make yourself a new diadem. Generally good luck with all metalwork, cause I’m out of here.

Manwë: I’ll hire Elven smiths *looks at Elven smiths*

Mahtan: Don’t look at me, I’m with Aulë.

Fëanor: Are you fucking serious right now Manwë

Nerdanel: You made the little guy upset, go away.

Curufin: Lol bye.

Celebrimbor: Sorry, I don’t speak Dwarf haterish.

Rog: What are you gonna do? Enslave me like your brother did?

Eöl: I don’t take commissions. I forge hatred.

Manwë: …

Manwë: Fine. The Dwarf is staying.

Manwë: Also smiths are bitches.

Eol’s line killed me 😂😂😂

Another reason why Beren is a sweetheart:

Remember Gorlim, and in particular how he is remembered as “the Unhappy”?

Beren was the only survivor of his dad’s heroic last stand group, and the only one to see the “wraith of Gorlim” and receive his warning. Which means he must have been the one who relayed that part of the story to the Elves or other Edain, who then wrote songs and histories about it. Given the detailed description of Gorlim’s backstory, his reasons for the betrayal and the emphasis on the mitigating circumstances, the most likely in-universe explanation is that Beren made sure he would be viewed sympathetically.

“The Unhappy” is not a positive epithet, of course, but it’s a lot more flattering than some of the other possibilities. Gorlim is a far more sympathetic
character than other notable traitors like Maeglin or Grima, and I know it’s because he actually was a better person. But in-universe, the main reason anyone would know all that has to be Beren’s decision to tell his story this way, even though he lost the last of his family and companions because of that betrayal. Many people would not have been as kind to Gorlim’s memory in his place, even considering his obvious regret and the attempted post-mortem warning.

curufins-smile:

Owl

Part 1 – After Her Death

Finwion lies next to Finwë, his soft baby snores and occasional movements the only thing breaking the silence of his bedchamber, lit by the silvery light of Telperion. Finwë knows he has a bassinet for his son to sleep in at the foot of the bed, but Finwion’s warm little body is such a comfort in his grief that he cannot bear to let him go, even as his tears soak into his soft, downy hair.

He cannot cry forever. His thoughts drift from his ever present sorrow to contemplate the pins and needles plaguing his arm. His son may be small but he is a healthy baby and his arm is in an awkward position beneath him. He shifts in an attempt to get more comfortable. Finwion stirs and emits a wail of discontent at being jostled, but Finwë is quick to stand and gather him up to gently bounce in an attempt to stave off any waterworks. He holds Finwion in one arm as he quietly attempts to get feeling back in the other.

In all honesty, he is glad for the distraction from his own thoughts.

“I’m sorry, Finwion,” he coos quietly, in the hopes that his voice might soothe him, “I did not mean to wake you!”

He takes Finwion over to the window, in the hopes that the silver light which usually fascinates his son will help to calm him. It is futile, and Finwion’s cries only grow louder.

Finwë then tries the mobile above the bassinet, the dangling shapes and mirrors usually able to bring absolute joy from his baby, who loves to try to grasp them with fat fists, but it is no use.

He casts his eyes around the room, and stops when he sees it, lying innocently in Finwion’s cot.

It is a soft, stuffed owl, about as large as his infant son. The owl is stitched from soft fabric, and is slightly worn from Finwion’s clumsy baby love. Finwë knows it very well by now. He watched Míriel stitch it early on in her pregnancy, before she was too tired to lift her needle. They were so happy then, their world filled with nothing but joy at the thought of the bright life they would be bringing into the world. Finwë remembers excitedly pressing his hands to her swollen belly, already able to feel the heat of the tiny spark of fëa within her. Before that tiny spark grew to a roaring flame that consumed her whole.

Finwë holds that flame in his arms now, and the heat of his soul still grows with every passing day. Sometimes Finwë wonders if his son’s fëa will ever stop increasing, or if it will one day reach an inferno that consumes everything it touches like it engulfed Míriel.

He attempts to shake off the morbid thoughts, and turns his attention to his wailing son once more. Picking up the owl, he shifts Finwion to a more comfortable position and presents him with the toy.

The reaction is almost magical. Finwion does not immediately silence, but he latches on to the owl and his sobs begin to quieten. Finwë lies him down on the bed again, and watches Finwion curl against the toy. He cannot help but chuckle as he watches a fluffy wing find its place in Finwion’s mouth for him to gently gum on.

“That’s going to need a wash soon,” he mutters quietly to himself, suddenly exhausted.

Finwë closes the heavy curtains to darken the room once more, then climbs back into bed as carefully as possible, slotting himself around Finwion’s warmth. He is still not yet used to the softness of his bed after the centuries of sleeping on rougher things, first in Cuivienen, then on the Great Journey. But he finds himself drifting off rather quickly, sped by the soft snuffling of his son.

–

Thanks to @alackofghosts as always for inspo stuff, and to @nixiegenesis and @acommonanomaly for reading this over to check for any infant behaviour inaccuracies. @nathair-nimhe this is me finally writing you a fic 🙂

This is going to be part of a series of fics about feanor’s early childhood, set around his stuffed owl.

penny-anna:

In Return of the King Pippin says he’s known of Gandalf for years but didn’t actually know him pre-quest and I like to imagine the same applying in reverse. 

Gandalf never met Pippin pre-quest but he knew who Pippin was bcos his reputation preceded him. Every time Gandalf passed through the Shire ppl would be like ‘you’ll never guess what the Thain’s son’s gone and done this week’ and he was like ‘fascinating tell me more’

& then when Pippin showed up in Rivendell w Frodo he was like ‘YOU!!!’